Currently. + Our Weekend {Vol. 8}

Thinking about how I'm so incredibly irritable right now. Everything that anyone says is like nails on a chalkboard. Okay, you want cheese and a burger, I get it, Lia. Yes, I love you with all my heart, but right now, I can't be talked to anymore. And you don't get the picture. 

I know that it's not helping at all to ignore the constant begging and questions. But right now, I can't take it.

I'm not helping this situation at all, and I don't know how to get out of it. It's CONSTANT from constant people to constant talking to constant asking for things to constantly being in my face.

Sometimes I just want it to stop. Stop crying.

Shit.

Glad I got that out. Can I get some grace up in here? I know it's there, waiting for me to accept, but damn, I'm in a funk that's hard to let go of.

Reading some Jesus stuff. At least, that's what I need to read after what I just wrote ^^. Ugh. Now I just feel guilt. That heavy blanket of guilt laying over me and won't let go.

Okay, I'll go apologize and ask for forgiveness. She will forgive me for my lack of patience and grace and love.

Right?

She folds into my arms -- and it's all I can do not to cry.

"Jesus loves you." I tell her --- wanting her to remember that no matter how I act and no matter what I say, she has someone SO much bigger than me, than my sin, than my weaknesses, who loves her so much more than I will ever know.

"Do you love me?" she asks.

"More than anything in the whole world."

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Listening to Beyonce's crazy new album. Have you heard about it? Please tell me you have. It's called a "visual album," and she released 14 songs and 17 videos all on one day without any promotion. She's insane. And amazing. And beautiful. And insane.

Do NOT watch any of the videos around your kiddos though - I'm pretty sure the word explicit doesn't do it justice. It is very sexual - and this is my first Beyonce album, so I had no idea how sexual she was (or if this is the first time it's so explicit).

But. It makes for some mighty good beats. And sometimes, that's all you need.

Thankful for my girls. They are so patient with me, even when I feel like crap like today, or when I don't think I can give any more. They pull out of me every ounce of patience, and when I think I'm bone dry, they force me to find some more.

This has to help me get to heaven, right?

But.

They are also everything I need them to be. They are so incredibly kind and sweet and loving and everything that I need at the end of the longest days to remember that I have a Savior who loves me. Unconditionally. They squeeze me and I cradle them, and it is an embrace that the Father dances with me all the while.

He is never dry, He is never weary, He is never impatient, He is never without.

And I have Him.

I'm going to leave you with photos of our weekend, linking up with the incredibly beautiful and talented Annapolis & Company.

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In between tweeting, reading books to my daughters, and [not] burning mac n cheese, I am the Founder + Creative Director of Blessed is She women's ministry + community.