I sit down into my couch, open up my laptop, and see my reflection in my screen before it boots up.
I study the reflection I see -- a woman with tired eyes, dirty hair, days-old pajama shirt, a worn-out soul.
I remember when the image I used to see was one filled with excitement and fervor, with my fingertips bouncing against the keys as I worked and tapped away.
I remember when the woman I used to recognize was a zealous woman, so carefree and full of life.
But you know what? Life sometimes can be wearing on a soul. The cross we bear can sometimes feel like too much -- physically, emotionally, spiritually.
I can feel myself in the current of the waves of life, steadily they're rising, and steadily my fear grows bigger and bigger.
What is to come next, Lord? Where do I go from here? And where are You?
I pray for peace, for guidance, for assurance that all will be well. And yet my fear and anxiety seem to overwhelm me, the sea getting bigger and taller and more menacing all around me.
It is all so much.
I flip open my Bible, and it opens up to Psalm 93, verses 3-4:
The flood has raised up, LORD;
the flood has raised up its roar;
the flood has raised its pounding waves.
More powerful than the roar of many waters,
more powerful than the breakers of the sea,
powerful in the heavens is the LORD.
The waves crash and pound all around, rocking me to my core.
But our God, He is more powerful. Our God, He is more majestic. Our God, His glory is unmatched.
The sea and the waves begin to settle, their menacing crashes seem to quiet as I close my eyes and stand in awe of our powerful and loving God.
The God who calms the seas in my life, and in yours.
The God who steadies the worries in my life, and in yours.
The God who is present and comforting in my life, and in yours.
The God who even the seas obey... He is for me. He is for you.
The waves will crash and they will pound and they will taunt you and me with their menacing roars... but look sister, there it is. There is a break in the dark sky.
More powerful than the roar of the waters, more powerful than the breakers of the sea, powerful in the heavens is the Lord.
Our Light, our Savior, our Peace, He has come.
The screen goes dark on my computer screen, and I see the girl in the reflection. The girl held by our great God. The girl brought to her knees in awe of a God who is mighty in power and yet at the same time mighty in love.
I see the girl floating in the sea of life, held by a comforting Father who whispers quietly in her ear over the sound of the waters, I am here, I am here, I am here.
All around me are women who are held by this comforting Father, the One even the seas surrender to. All around me are worn-out souls being filled with grace. All around me are tired eyes being woken up.
We are waking up.
In between tweeting, reading books to my daughters, and [not] burning mac n cheese, I am the Founder + Creative Director of Blessed is She women's ministry + community.