I sit here at my desk as my two daughters nap, wondering why it is that I feel this heavy sense of Pride.
Why it seems to swallow me up and wrangle me around without a care in the world.
Why I badly just want to be close to Jesus but Pride is kicking me on the floor while I cry and feel weak.
Why I have worked hard for a long time wanting nothing to do with Pride.
Why I have tried to avoid sexual sin, pornography, excessive alcohol, gossip (Lord, help me!), anger, laziness in prayer...
Why I wanted to wear humility like a cloak that lay over me and protect me from the evils of the world.
Yet Pride still got in.
I am trying to DO all the right things.
I'm trying to BE the right person that I feel I am called to be.
But Pride. He takes me before I can even say no.
And I want badly to go back to humility and to safety and to feeling like I am empty, so empty without my God.
Back to where I didn't look around and see all the things I want to be doing because I am entitled to do them or all the things I think I can do better than him or than her.
I want badly to go back to having a clear conscience of this Ugly Thing Called Pride.
Get behind me, Satan.
I want to see my Father.
In between tweeting, reading books to my daughters, and [not] burning mac n cheese, I am the Founder + Creative Director of Blessed is She women's ministry + community.